Thursday, March 3, 2016

...i smell the smelly smell of something that smells smelly...

I wouldn't necessarily call my eight-year old cousin Daniel picky.
He is, however, someone who knows what he does and does not like.

When it comes to food, he is a young man with simple tastes -- cheese pizza, plain pasta (and I mean plain, like, cooked in boiling water, drained, and on his plate) with grated Parmesan, Cheez-its, pretzels, Oreos.
If I had to pick Daniel's number one favorite snack, though, I would have to go with Club crackers and creamy Italian dressing.

This might seem like a very strange combination, but it is a complimentary appetizer, of sorts, at one of our most popular local restaurants - The Mall Deli.
Crackers and dressing, who knew?

Personally, this would be my least favorite snack. Don't get me wrong, I love the buttery richness of a Club cracker. It's the creamy Italian I can forever do without.

Nothing about it appeals to me. I just do not love the smell.
It's too...What word am I looking for here?...tangy. It smells tangy.
And, unless I'm at the Deli with someone who loves "creamy", I don't even allow the waitress to leave a bottle of it at the table.

I know I'm going on about my dislike of this condiment and it might seem silly to you. It seems silly to me sometimes, too. I really don't appreciate it in my life, but I am an adult and I can get over it. I'm not like one of those freaks who can't even pass someone a sealed jar of mayonnaise -- looking at you Aunt Maria.

Every once in a while, Daniel will bring "crackers and creamy" as his school snack and, as I am his teacher, I am subject to it's smell.

I try not to let it get to me. It's just a snack for Pete's sake and Dan does love it so much, and I love him. I can endure 10 minutes of a smell I don't like if it brings this boy 10 minutes of happiness.

Today, however, as Daniel was opening the container that held his beloved creamy Italian dressing, it kind of exploded and dressing went all over him.

It was simultaneously funny and horrifying.

As I sit here typing this, Daniel ,and my classroom, smell like tangy creamy Italian dressing.

It is not making me a happy camper.

Five smelly things I would rather smell than the tang of this dressing:
     * canned meats
     * sulfur (egg smell, for the non-scientific types)
     * fertilizer
     * the dog food plant
     * skunk

** UPDATE **
Joy brought Daniel a change of pants.
The smell is gone.